Why I Stayed With An Abusive Partner – And How Emotional Abuse Gave Me PTSD @ Everyday Feminism

"I’m now the perfect fourth-grade room mother. My church mentors tell me to read books and listen to lectures on praying for my husband and understanding his needs. I work very hard to present the front of a perfectly happy family. My kids are involved in multiple activities that I, of course, solely organize and am responsible for. I’ve begun to drop subtle hints to the other moms but when they confront me I adamantly deny it. No, everything is great, I insist. I point to all the happy family photos I post to Facebook as evidence. I’m not sure which scares me more: the fear that others will find out my secret, or that my husband will find out I told the truth about our marriage. I realize I’m now afraid of him. DRIP, DRIP. And then one day, I wake up and realize the house is flooding. My head bobs under the water. I’m scared. I also see the fear in my children’s eyes. Oh dear God, what have I done? How did we get here? Who have I become? The night he throws his cell phone at me and narrowly misses my head, I want to pack the kids in the car and leave. The evening at the dinner table when he stands up and throws a fork at me in front of the kids, I want to leave."

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